My Personal Self Love Secrets
Did you know that if you Google the words “self love” you’ll come up with 84,500,000 results?
Yup. That’s a whole lot of people with a whole lot to say on the topic of self love.
I have struggled with self love for most of my life. I knew what it WAS. I knew OTHER people had it. And I also knew that if I could somehow snaffle some for myself, it would probably equal less stuffing myself silly with food. But hey, food was so readily accessible and self love? Well… sometimes it still feels like an enigma to me. I mean, how do you actually “get” self love?
Over the years I’ve decided that self love is not so much a noun as it is a verb (are you madly trying to recall your fifth grade english lessons? You know, the ones you skipped so you could kiss the boy you liked behind the school sports lockers? Oh, wait! That was me.)
Okay, so here it is… self love is not something you GET. It’s something you DO. Essentially, it’s about giving yourself the same compassion and kindness that you freely give to other people.
It means not smacking yourself over the head with a block of Cadbury’s every time you eat a little more chocolate than you would have liked.
Or not going on an all-out binge just because you ate an extra slice (or three or four) of cake with your coffee.
It’s about treating yourself the same way you would treat someone you absolutely adored! And why shouldn’t you? The Number One, most adorable person in your world should be you!
Still a little hazy on the whole self love thang? No problemo! Here’s three of my personal faves that you can whip out from the self love closet and take ’em for a spin…
1. Don’t Close Yourself Off
Don’t close yourself off from the possibility that maybe, just maybe, you’re kind of a foxy babe. Yes, yes… I know we all would like to be thinner, prettier, more perfect. But that doesn’t make you IMPERFECT right now.
Don’t screw your nose up at your already awesome qualities just because you want more. Quit comparing yourself to other people’s random selfies on social media and accept that beauty cannot be defined. That’s why it’s different for every person. It’s all just perception. Don’t compare your Chapter One to somebody else’s Chapter Twenty. Focus on your own journey and own that badass story. Because the truth is, the only one writing it is you.
2. Cut to the Front of the Line
True self love means no more tearing yourself down. No more wishing you had a different life. No more cutting pictures of your head off of selfies and sticking them onto the body of your latest fitspo. Because you don’t have their body. And you won’t have their body. Simply take control of your current situation by expressing what you need. Don’t expect anybody to jump up and hand it to you. Why? Because actually… that’s not a thing.
Self love means you put your own oxygen mask on first. What does that look like? It looks like taking deep breaths. Being patient and compassionate with yourself. Doing something you actually enjoy. And no, that does NOT look like you spending an entire weekend in pyjamas and eating pizza in front of the TV. I’m talking about something you enjoy AND you feel good about doing. It means saying “no” to toxic people, regret and guilt and “yes” to green juice (or wine), mountain hikes (or long naps) and lots of laughter.
Love and embrace every part of yourself. It’s not going anywhere so you might as well BeYOUtiful.
3. Schedule It In
Here’s my hottest tip… Don’t wait until the morning to see if you feel like working out, eating right or even speaking to yourself kindly. Decide NOW that you will do those things whether you feeeeel like it or not. Be committed. Committed to what, you ask? Committed to YOU. Don’t let negative feelings and old stories rule your life.
Don’t let anyone make you believe you’re not good enough.
People want to tear you down because your beauty scares them.
Your determination threatens them.
It makes them look at their own weaknesses and they won’t like that.
But don’t you stop.
Don’t dim your light so that others can shine brighter.
Be the one who illuminates the path.
Love the person that you are right now on the way to where you’re going.
Why? Because she’s pretty freakin’ awesome.
Ready to throw in your two cents worth? Share your hottest self love tips in the comments below. And remember, people come here for inspiration and direction, so let’s support each other!
Oodles of chocolate coated love!